Water War with Jason Momoa

-Jason, since you play Aquaman, I wanted to challenge you to a “water war.” We’ll play the card game war, but if you lose the hand, you get a — [ Laughter ] You get a pint of water in the face, okay? We have five glasses of water. The first one to throw all […]

Trump Wanted to Build a Border Moat Filled with Snakes and Alligators

-You guys, it was 90 degrees today in New York City. 90. Right now, every guy in your office who wears shorts year-round is like, “Well, well, well, now who’s the weirdo?” That’s right. It was 90 degrees today here in New York. It was brutal out there. On the sidewalk, people were spritzing themselves […]

Can The Property Brothers And Kelly Convince Wanda Sykes To Eat Dog Food? | The Kelly Clarkson Show

– So we’re gonna eat this raw meat? – Yeah, yeah. It’s good, it’s like a good steak tartare, eh? – Yeah. – It’s exactly steak tartare. – Exactly. – I mean, you know guys, okay? So now your meat’s wet, and now we’re going to put on the plate, okay? – [Kelly] Okay. – […]

Kevin Hart Is Terrified of Robert Irwin’s Animals

-What animals did you bring for us tonight? -We’ve got some really good ones. -Don’t you dare. -It’s gonna be awesome. I’m starting off with something very cute and cuddly. This is Giselle. -Oh [bleep] [ Laughter and applause ] Come on, brother. -Kevin, stop. -Come on, man. -It’s all good. -No surprises. -Come on, […]

Jack White and Jimmy Fallon Play Grape Chess

[ Vivaldi’s “Four Seasons, Summer — Presto” playing ] ♪♪ [ Cheers and applause ] ♪♪ ♪♪ [ Clock ticking ] [ Laughter ] ♪♪ ♪♪ [ Squish ] ♪♪ -Check. [ Laughter, cheers and applause ] [ Thud, pop ] -Checkmate, bitch. See you next week. [ Cheers and applause ]

Joe Manganiello and Sofia Vergara Took on a Snake with an Axe and Katana Sword

-I was just looking at this. Look at you, a stud on the cover of “Men’s Health” right there. But this is what made me laugh. -What? Oh, no. -Dude, look. It’s bigger than your name. Look down here. “You and your penis.” -Well — -I just thought that was — -Why is my hand, […]

Elon Musk Might Be A Super Villain

BEFORE, PEOPLE ARE CALLED YOU THE REAL TONY STARK. OKAY, YOU’VE GOT YOUR FINGER IN SO MANY DIFFERENT ADVANCED TECHNOLOGIES. AS I SPADE SPACE-X, TESLA. NOW YOU’VE GOT SOLAR CITY AND SOLAR PACK THAT PEOPLE PUT IN THEIR HOUSES.( APPLAUSE )ARE YOU SINCERELY TRYING TO SAVE THE WORLD?>>WELL, I’M TRYING TO DO GOOD THINGS, YEAH. […]

Tonight Showbotics: Jimmy Meets Sophia the Human-Like Robot

-♪ Tonight Showbotics, Tonight Showbotics ♪ ♪ Yeah ♪ -Welcome to “Tonight Showbotics.” Let’s meet our first robot. Please welcome, from Carnegie Mellon University in Pittsburgh, Howie Choset and Snake Bot. How you doing, buddy? -Nice to meet you. -Howie, nice to see you. -♪ Yeah ♪ -Thank you for coming on the show. I’m […]

Meanwhile… Ruth-less Bader Ginsburg

NOW, FOLKS, YOU KNOW I SPEND A LOT OF TIME OVER THERE HARVESTING THE JUICIEST NEWS FRUIT TO MAKE YOU THE BEAUTIFUL EDIBLE ARRANGEMENTS BOUQUET THAT IS MY MONOLOGUE. BUT SOMETIMES, I LIKE TO TAKE THE LEFTOVER CANTALOUPE AND HONEY DEW RINDS OF NEWS, TOSS THEM OUT BACK WITH SOME EGG SHELLS, AVOCADO SKINS, COFFEE […]

Pete Buttigieg: The Case For A Younger President

>>Stephen: HEY, EVERYBODY! WELCOME BACK TO THE SHOW! ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, MY NEXT GUEST IS THE MAYOR OF SOUTH BEND, INDIANA, AND HE’S RUNNING TO BE THE NEXT PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES. PLEASE WELCOME MAYOR PETE BUTTIGIEG! ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) ( BAND PLAYING ) WELCOME TO THE […]